Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The Single Girl Files: Reason #682 why Jill needs a man. And while we’re at it, Reason #683, too.

Remember when I told you, via a Single Girl Files post, that I really needed a man because I didn’t own a hammer and I didn’t know how to fix things?

Well.  Apparently, I need one around for other reasons too.

Case in point:  Saturday morning, I had an appointment at the local garage to have my winter tires put on.  My mom had called and made the appointment for me earlier in the week, then called to let me know I had to have my car there by 9 AM Saturday morning.  Because I had plans to go with Lindsay to pick up my bridesmaid dress in Arnprior at 9 AM, I made arrangements with her to pick me up at the garage at 8 AM.  It wasn’t open yet, so I just left my keys under the mat for them.

I hopped in her Jeep and off we went.  It was a wonderful morning.  I was able to try on my dress (IT FRIGGIN’ FIT!!!!), and then we went out for breakfast (Eggs Benedict…deep-fried homefries…mmmmm…IT MIGHT NO LONGER FIT!!!!). 

Copy of MVT Christmas Party 031[3] This is the sneak peek of the dress Linds posted on her blog yesterday.  As you can see, I’m going to have a hard time looking tall and skinny next to REBEKKA!!!

We were headed back to take the Ferry home around 11:30 AM when Lindsay, very casually, said to me, “So…you said you they were putting your winter tires on for you today?”

“Yep.”

“Well…were your tires already there?”

“Oh…ummm…”

That’s right.  I had taken my car and parked it in the garage lot, and left them my keys.

But I didn’t take my winter tires.

Crap.

So I quickly called my mom on my cell, and said, “So…does Mark have my tires at the garage?”  (Hoping, against hope, that maybe he stored them for me for the summer or something?  Because I’m sure that’s a normal thing for a garage to do, right?)

“WELL HE DOES NOW!” she exclaimed.

Turns out, Mother had waited and waited for me to stop in and get my winter tires out of their garage, and when I didn’t appear, she loaded them up and took them over herself.  She then proceeded to tell Mark, “My daughter needs a man.  She apparently didn’t realize that she had to actually bring her tires for you to put on!”

And of course, uproarious laughter ensued.

Woopsies.

Gimme a break.  I’m a girl.  My mom told me I had to have the car there at 9 AM, but she never told me I had to take the tires with me!!!!

Totally her fault.

*sigh*

Oh, and while we’re at it.  Another reason I need a man?  I have a brother. And a brother-in-law.  And neither of them are overly co-operative when I ask them to help me put up Christmas lights.

On Sunday, we were celebrating my soon-to-be sister-in-law’s birthday at my place.  PERFECT chance for the boys to put up my lights.  I had put net lights on the little tree at the front door already, and even assembled and connected the little snowman I had bought too.  That was a big accomplishment.

But I had also bought red lights to go on the big spruce tree between my house and the church next door.  We did that a few years ago and they looked so nice, but last year I left it too late and never got them up.  I think I also had mowed the extension chord or something.  (What?  You’re supposed to take lights down before summer time?  Who knew…) Anyways…I got a new extension chord, new lights…All I needed were the men to put them up.  And I had two of them sitting right there in my living room. 

Excellent opportunity.

Holy smokes, you’d think I’d asked them to do some really hard, terrible job.  Like open-heart surgery or something.  They weren’t overly enthusiastic about it.  And they were mad at me because I didn’t have a good ladder for them to use.

Um, hello?  This is me, remember?  The girl who didn’t even own a hammer.  Now you magically expect me to have a nice ladder in my possession?  Sure.

They found this rickety old wooden ladder in my garage, and leaned it precariously against the tree, and then they just kind of tossed the lights on haphazardly.

I’m not complaining.  They look fine.  I’m happy they are up.  My deepest thanks to Luke and Chris for obliging me.

But if I had a man to boss around, he would’ve spent a lot more time making it just right.  And he hopefully would’ve come with a good ladder, too.

Now.  There is some good news, folks.  I have made progress.

I actually do own a hammer now.  I bought a whole tool set a few weeks ago at Canadian Tire.  A pink one.  Because that’s the kind of tools girls use.

Canadian Tire_39 Piece toolkit_0992273C__09_067801

The bad news?  I forgot to buy nails.

Hammers are kind of useless without nails, I’ve discovered.

I also bought a set of shelves that I was going to put up ALL BY MYSELF with my BRAND NEW PINK TOOL KIT and I was so excited about it.

Until I read the instructions, and it said I needed a drill.  My pink tool kit came with a hammer, a tape measure, a screwdriver, an exacto knife, pliers, scissors, and a bunch of little do-dads that I have no idea what they are for.

No drill.

F me.

***

Once again, linking today’s Single Girl Files post up with Talk To Us Tuesday, hosted by Impulsive Addict and Shawn.  What are you talking about today?  Be sure to join in the fun and link up!

Talk2Us

18 comments:

Jen said...

Looking FANTASTIC in the dress! Way to go!!! I love reading your blog, you crack me up everytime!!! Cute tool set!

Anonymous said...

Your blog is awesome! I always get a good laugh. Funny thing is whenever I get my winter tires put on I always seem to forget to put the tires in the car until I'm at the end of the driveway and then I'm like oh crap and I have to go get them. So far, I haven't forgot them completely yet though.

Steph said...

I have a pink tool set but it's not near as badass as yours.

Nicole said...

Oh that's hilarious, because just yesterday I got your address from Lindsay to mail you a hammer/tool set... I just hadn't gotten it bought... I was working on that but having issues yesterday. It was going to be lavender though instead of pink. That's tooooooo funny! Now make sure you have a level to make your shelves level :) although tape measure's work for that too!

Connie said...

When you find that man....before you commit to anything, make sure he is handy.

Mine...is not handy and we have to call *people* to do stuff for us.

And he'd never in a million years put lights up for Christmas!

VandyJ said...

If I didn't have a guy who was handy and all, I'd be lost. But you can put together shelves without a drill--a drill just makes it so much easier.

Anonymous said...

You know it's funny - and this sounds so negative- but for all the reasons I would think I need a man (like you've mentioned) my husband does none of those. LOL. I mow the lawn and, well, initiate Christmas lights (he ends up doing it b/c I go inside while he's on the ladder!) but all in all, I would say the typical man things I end up doing and he picks up the slack. I guess everyone's different!

Stacie said...

1. Skinny and tall is overrated!
2. Car stuff stresses me, I would freak if I had to change my tires in the winter!
3. Christmas lights make me cuss...

Anonymous said...

Yes, tall and skinny are overrated!!

And the pink tool set-- classy!!

Becca said...

Men are useful for so many things in life! I love your tool kit! And you are rocking the dress! Your blog is great!

Janette @ The Johanson Journey said...

You are too funny girl. How weird that you have to store tires! I've never heard of that! i've heard of people putting chains on them but didn't know they had seasonal tires. I wish I knew more about fixing things or putting things together and then I wouldn't have to ask my husband for help and get his sighs of dread much like your brother and brother in law gave you.

You look AH-MAZ-ING!!

Chell said...

I grew up some in Maine but now, living in "the south" for so long... I totally forgot about "winter tires". That just took me back. Diggin' the pink tools.

Robin said...

But you're getting there. I mean sure having a man around to do those crappy little nail breaking jobs is fine but you are managing.

and totally your mom's fault.

Anonymous said...

LOL I would totally forget to put the winter tires in the car too!

Impulsive Addict said...

I would have done EXACTLY what you did. Who knew you had to take the tires? HA! I'm laughing with you right now. Yes, Jill needs a MAN! Let's work on that, ok?

I'm LOVING your pink tools. My mom has a few pink tools too that she got from a tool party. I just used some tools tonight but they weren't pink. =(

Thanks for linking up!! I'm going slightly crazy in Oklahoma right now so I'm sorry I'm just now commenting! It's been a crazy few days...or weeks. AH!

Grumpy Grateful Mom said...

Oh, you sound like me. Lol! Too many things to remember.

I love your pink tool set. I would like to get myself one of those. I have a wonderful husband, but he is not so handy and is not a light putter upper.

Alexandra Rose said...

Haha oh no that sucks that your took kit didn't have a drill... or nails! I guess DIY is pretty useless without either. On the other hand your took kit is frickin AWESOME! I always get my mum to come over and do all my D.I.Y for me. It is sooo not my department.
Visiting from the hop.
http://beingmama.com/
http://ohsoprettylife.blogspot.com/

Kara said...

Ah man - tool kit was on my Xmas list to buy for you - could you not have waited until Xmas was over????