Friday, April 08, 2011

A Lesson for Carrie Underwood

Did any of you see Carrie Underwood on Ellen yesterday?

Just after I sort of give her a little blog shout out. Just after I give her a little cred for an awesome performance with Steven Tyler. Just after I start to think maybe I wouldn't shoot laser beams of death out of my eyeballs at her if I saw her anymore.

Then she goes on Ellen. And starts slammin' Mike.


"Oh haha, yeah, Ellen, I married this Canadian hockey player, and he stayed in Canada and I went to Nashville, and then he got traded to Nashville so he moved in with me and brought all of his...crap."

Carrie Underwood, get one thing straight: Mike Fisher's belongings are not crap. Whatever that man touches is gold, and I'm so sorry you had to make room in your closet for his big fat "man clothes", but do you realize how badly most of the women in Ottawa would have liked to have made room for him in their closets??
She called him a hoarder. She called him fat. Then she said he loves to shop and buys all kinds of clothes that she does not have room for. Pretty much anything you could do to humiliate and emasculate a big, strong, handsome hockey player, she did it.

Ooooooh my blood was just BOILING.

Okay, okay. I know that Mike wouldn't care. Or his big tough hockey player friends. In fact, none of them probably even watched it.

But, for future reference, Carrie, when speaking about your stunningly hot, adorably sweet husband on talk shows, these are more appropriate things to say about him:

  • "My husband Mike is the most wonderful man on the face of the earth and I'm so very very lucky to have him."

  • "Mike is the best hockey player in the world, and I only wish he'd been able to continue playing in Ottawa, because we loved it there."

  • "Mike's hockey career is far more important than my silly singing, and I would be happy to take a back seat to him anyday."

  • "Mike Fisher is AMAZING."

  • "Canadians are the best, and I'm so lucky to have married someone from the Great White North. I hope we can move up there permanently someday, because I know that's what Mike would like."

  • "Mike is the second-hottest hockey player in the world (after Wade Redden, of course), and I'm so sorry that I took him away from all of his beautiful fans. Trust me, he misses you all."

That's about it. That's about all you should ever, ever say, Carrie.

No more making fun of Mike on Ellen. Or anywhere. (Especially after we see clips of your new-found pathetic acting abilities.)

Know your place.

On another note - I missed the Idol results show, but Twitter told me that Pia got voted out?!? PIA?!? What the F?!?

It would appear she's fallen victim to the curse of "Jill's Pick to Win". This is not the first time this has happened. Just ask Chris Daughtry, Greg Neufeld, the Piggott Brothers... Usually, whoever I pick as the early contender to win is shocked by being sent home far too early.

My apologies to Pia for putting her under my curse. I really thought she had a good shot at winning the whole thing, and I do believe the contestant with the best voice was sent home last night.


Have a great weekend, everyone :)


Stacy said...

i really like Carrie and I really am glad that I don't hear her saying those things (you putting it out there doesn't count) - I have never witnessed her being mean towards Mike so I like her still! LOL

Nancy said...

I still like Carrie, but agree, she should not trash talk her gorgeous, wonderful not fat hubby on Ellen. I was shocked and disappointed!

PKB said...

Wasn't she on some other late night talk show recently where she laughed at the Ottawa fans for being mad at her for Mike being traded to Nashville? She said something like she wished she could have that much power. She said they won't be having kids for years and years. She also said she was UFC'd out cause he watches it all the time, records it and then watches it again the next day and then his friends come over and they watch it again. She really likes to complain about him! Maybe she shouldn't have married him if he's so annoying!

Muffin Top to Smokin Hot said...

I don't like Carrie Underwood anyway and those low blows... yeah that's rude and disrespectful to your husband... think it'll last?

Ashley said...

Awwww, Carrie - so uncalled for. Not impressed! I'm with you Jill, know your role lady...don't diss hottie Mike ever. :) said...

HAHA! Love it! My thoughts though...Is their home not large enough for "his and hers closets"?? I would assume they would have a large enough home for each to have their own closet...NO??!! lol