Thursday, August 30, 2012

It’s the end of the summer…

It's the end of the summer,
It's the end of it all,
Those days are gone, its over now,
we’re moving on…

Truth be told, I hate that Theory of a Deadman song. 

It fills me with a sense of melancholy at a time of year when I’m already wistfully looking back; already starting to miss the long hazy days filled with sunshine and lawn chairs and cool drinks in hand.

And yet, it’s the song on my mind these days, as the evenings grow cooler, the days gradually become shorter, and the first bittersweet signs of autumn begin to creep in.

People laugh at me when I moan about the poor kids having to go back to school, but I’m not lying when I say there’s an ache in my heart – a heaviness, as I drive down my road on the way to work and I have to wave at the boys out waiting for their buses.  Maybe they’re actually excited to go back, and there’s no doubt their parents are clicking their heels with joy.  Yet, it takes me back to those mornings when I had to pose at the end of my laneway with my backpack on, glaring at the camera, usually tears filling my eyes.

I loved school – but I hated going back at the start of each year.  It always broke my heart having to say good-bye to the summer.

It still does.

I don’t think I could have asked for much more this summer.  Weather-wise, it was spectacular (as long as you weren’t a farmer) – record-breaking heat waves; long, dry spells perfect for sun-tanning on my mom’s patio with a Palm Bay in hand; warm nights at the ball field and those wonderfully cheap ‘ball park beers’. 

There were fun wedding festivities, a road trip, a few days of reminiscing at the camp, pool parties, and a train ride to Toronto.

I turned 29.  And it wasn’t terrible.

A satisfying summer filled with good times with family and friends.  Really, I couldn’t have asked for more.

And honestly, I’m so ready for fall

The thoughts of cozy sweaters and scarves, evening walks in crisp cool air, mugs of hot tea, the beautiful changing of the leaves – and yes, even the nights at the ball park, when you wonder if maybe you should have brought a pair of mittens along, because hanging on to the cold beer can with icy fingers feels like the dumbest thing you’ve ever done…

It’s impossible to forget Shawville Fair.  The official kick-off to ‘the changing of the seasons’.  And that wild ride begins tonight.

So much to look forward to.  So much excitement building for all the fun that fall brings along with it.

…Yet still, that uneasy ache. 

There’s a sadness at letting summer go that lingers, taking hold of me, making me wish we could go back and do it all over again.

I’ve never been good with good-byes.

And watching this summer fade, and slowly slip away?

Well, it feels like one of the hardest good-byes yet.

It's the end of the summer,
But we'll see it all again.
So hold on to this moment till then…


Jen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lindsay said...

See ya later summer!! You've been good but glad to see you leave!! See you in 2013! xo

Jen said...

I hear ya Jill! I love summer too....boating, beaches, hot sunny days, cold drinks, cottage life....
We packed up the cottage last weekend and it was a sad, sad day! But, like you, I'm also excited for what fall has to offer.
See you at the fair....a sure sign summers come to an end!

Sarah said...

Me too, I actually had real tears in my eyes driving to work today...I can't believe Shawville Fair starts tonight, summer is offically over :(

It was an awesome summer for weather and I am sad to see the hot sunny days dissapear but fall is fun too - thanksgiving, car rally, halloween

Sheena said...

No pressure, but will someone have a Beavertail for me? So weird being away for the Fair.

VandyJ said...

I think the summer to fall transition is the only one where I still long for summer but look forward to fall. All the other transitions I'm happy to see the old season go.

Emmy said...

I totally did not want summer to end either. It was just a fun summer and I loved our easy mornings. Glad you had a good summer

Nicole said...

Beautifully written! And I'm so torn, I'm ready for fall and my hoodie, yet Summer is my all time favorite and I'm going to miss it! I always loved that school was in the winter because it at least gave me somewhere to go when it was yucky out :)

Stacie said...

It will be back around before you know it!

Holly from 300 Pounds Down said...

Found your blog via another one. I totally relate to what you are saying here!! I am also the sad mom when school starts. Most of the people I know can't wait to get their kids off but I'm the mom that is always a little bummed. Of course I do enjoy my free time but for some reason I always get a little sad at the start. And I hadn't thought too much about the benefits of fall until you mentioned scarves. So there is something to look forward to!!