The Day the Dress Didn’t Fit

I’ve talked quite a bit about my weight-loss goals here on the blog, and as you may recall, the kick-in-the-ass that I desperately needed came in the form of bridesmaid dresses.

For some crazy reason, I keep ordering dresses that don’t fit me, vowing to lose weight to fit into them.  My sister has suggested this is a fabulous way to keep me on track – as long as I have a wedding to be in about every 6 months, I should drop 100 lbs. before you know it!! (ha-ha, yeah right)

First, I ordered a dress for my friend Lindsay’s wedding that was too small.  I had 9 months to work on losing weight to fit into it.  It wouldn’t be easy – losing weight never is – but it was very, realistically, doable.

Then – THEN! – I ordered an even smaller dress for Luke & Amanda’s wedding.  And I only had a month-and-a-half to figure that one out. 

Plus, Christmas was thrown into the middle of it.

No idea what I was thinking.  Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Two weeks ago, I was scheduled to go try on my dress for Luke & Amanda’s wedding.  And that day, I think I actually had a panic attack over it.  In my head, I was imagining this little Oriental woman who runs the store shrieking at me, “Oh nooo!  It no fit!  You say it ft!!!  You say you lose weight!!!!!  You bad, bad person!!!”

In my imagination, she turned into a very fiery, angry little dragon who told me she could not fix my dress, that I was too big, and that I should have never ordered such a small size.

And then I couldn’t breathe.  For real.

Thank God for those deep Yoga breaths Amanda has been teaching me.

I just had a gut feeling.  I knew that dress wasn’t going to fit.  Maybe if I’d been a little more careful over the holidays, maybe if I’d been more faithful in eating my fat-burning soup, maybe if I’d gone for a walk now and then instead of staying plunked in front of the TV so much…

So it was no damn surprise when I slipped on the dress, tugged a little at the zipper, and realized there was no way in hell it was ever going to zip up.

The pleasant part?  That little fiery dragon that had come to life in my mind was actually a total sweetheart.

I came out of that dressing room with fear in my eyes, and I said, “It doesn’t fit.  I can’t zip it up.”

She turned me around, assessed the damage, and then started crying, “It’s okay!  I fix it!  No problem, no problem!  It’s okay!”

And the little magic-worker didn’t let me down.  I have no idea how much she had to let that dress out, but when I went to try it on Monday, it fit.

Zipped up like a charm.

But the weight-loss project is not over – I hope to continue to lose weight until I reach my goal (still about 30 lbs. away from it) – and if I happened to lose some more of those pounds and inches in the weeks to come, I’ll only be more comfortable in my dress on Luke & Amanda’s big day.

I still have hopes that by the time Lindsay & Ryan’s wedding rolls around, they’ll need to take my dress in.

That would be a first for me.

That’s the new goal.