Thursday, October 13, 2011

The One Where I Tell You All About My Long-Ass Day Waiting for Furniture.

Holy Mother.  What a week.  A four-day week and it feels like it’s been going on FOR.EV.ERRRRRR.

Of course, yesterday felt like the longest day in the history of the world.  I was sitting at home waiting for my new furniture to arrive. 

Exciting stuff, right? 

Well, yes.  Except for the fact that I was stranded on the first floor of my house (because I was afraid if I went upstairs or to the basement, I’d miss hearing the delivery guys knock.  This has happened before.  If I’m not in the living room or dining room, I don’t hear knocks.  And I don’t have a doorbell).  With nothing better than a delivery time of “between 8 AM and 6 PM”.  AND I had already shipped the old furniture off to make room for the new stuff, so I had nowhere to sit but on the floor or at my dining room table.

Oh, and whaddya know, it also happened to be the day of “The Great World-Wide Blackberry Malfunction of 2011”.  So I had no phone, no Facebook, no Twitter, no BBM.

You really don’t realize how much you use that stuff til it’s gone and there’s nothing else to do.

I would say I started to get ansty around 9 AM.  By 9:30, I was already formulating the angry speech I was going to make when I called Sears at 6 PM if by some chance this furniture didn’t arrive.  (I’m a worrier.  I was convinced I had taken a whole day off work for nothing; that the furniture would never arrive.)

Between worrying, I read.  A lot.  I rotated back and forth from the dining room table to lying in the middle of my empty living room floor.  And when my book was done (by mid-afternoon), I seriously started to wonder WHAT THE F I WAS GOING TO DO.  I was literally standing in front of my DVD shelves, picking out all the “A” movies and getting ready to arrange them in alphabetical order (per Lindsay’s suggestion), when the delivery truck pulled up.  Around 4 PM.

Thank GOD.  I was going insaaaaane.

The delivery guys were nice enough.  When I ordered the set, the lady at Sears told me they would bring the furniture to the room I wanted it in, but they would not unpack the furniture.  They actually did unpack it, so bonus.  However, Buddy the Delivery Guy realized that the feet that are normally on the couches weren’t installed, they were in little baggies with screws attached to the furniture.  He kept telling me he didn’ t know why, that normally the feet were already installed, and he wondered if maybe I had a drill?

Um, Hello, Delivery Man.  I am a girl.  Living pretty much by myself.  I don’t even have a hammer or a tape measure.  But sure, let me go get you my handy dandy DRILL out of my big bad toolbox.


And wonder of wonders, I tried calling my mom to see if she could quickly run down with Dad’s drill (because Buddy was giving me the impression that he would install them himself if he had a drill) – and of course she picked that very time of day to have a lengthy phone conversation.  Awesome.

(*sidenote* Later, when I was complaining to my mother that she picked a wonderful time to do some phone-chatting, she said, “Well why didn’t you tell them you just had to run up here to grab a drill?  It would’ve only taken a few minutes.”  Yes, Mom.  Great plan.  Leave the strange delivery men in my living room unattended while I drive away to get a drill.  Beautiful idea.)

So Delivery Man tried installing the feet with a screwdriver, but no dice.  And he then informed me it wasn’t his job to install them anyways, but that I could call Sears if I wanted to complain.  Thanks ever so much, but I just want the feet on my couches, Delivery Man.  Not sure what Sears is gonna do about it.

Enter: Handyman Uncle Garry.  The best uncle ever.  (No offence to the other uncles, but you weren’t there at my time of need.  With your drills.)  He just happened to be visiting my dad when I finally got through to my mother, so she hauled him and his drill down to my house.  Before we knew it, feet were installed and furniture was upright and looking awesome!

Oh, but we weren’t outta the woods yet.  Mother asked where my cushions were.  What cushions, Ma? The matching ones that were supposed to come with it – two for the couch, two for the loveseat.

GADDAMMIT no cushions.  I didn’t even know I was supposed to get any, so of course I didn’t ask for them.

That one was quickly solved with a call to Sears, and they are having them shipped to the closest store for me to pick-up asap.  Cushion crisis averted.

Believe me, when the Furniture Drama was finally over, there was nothing I wanted more than to lie on them (all of them) and enjoy their comfy newness.  Because, holy stressful day of nothing.  I was worn.right.out.

It looks great.  I love it.  Best furniture I’ve ever bought without seeing it in person first.  (Like, how risky is THAT!!)

Sorry I’ve been so MIA this week – but it’s just been that kind of week.  I hope to get back on-track with my favourite linky parties next week!

Hope you’re all having a great one!


Nadine Hightower said...

Post photos! I love new stuff. my "new furniture" is used but I love it!!! we bought it at auction both pieces for under $100.

Kara said...

I wish you could have furniture delviered everyday - just so I could read a blog about it and lol...

Sarah said...

Can't wait to see the new furniture! You'll have to invite me over some night, maybe we can do supper together next week ;)

allstarme said...

My first thought was: Ok, so don't buy furniture from Sears. But since they corrected their error, maybe yes? ;)

PKB said...

I have had a few bad furniture experiences, actually every one of my experiences with furniture has been bad! At least they showed up the day they were supposed to. And they brought you the right stuff. Post a pic so we can check it out!

Impulsive Addict said...

YOU HAVE TO POST PICS! I wanna see!!!!

Nicole said...

Yeah, I think that kind of day would wear me out too!

Nancy said...

I thought your hid your grumpiness well, even when your Mom suggested you wash your baseboards since you had them exposed!

Can't wait to see the results. Why am I not surprised Uncle Gary came to the rescue...such a sweetie! You have great relatives.

Have you ever considered being a stand up comedienne? You tell the funniest stories!