Wednesday, December 09, 2009

The Death of Mr. Deer

I love snow. Abso-lute-ly LOVE IT!!

So I've anxiously anticipated this snowstorm we're in the midst of ever since they started warning us about it a few days ago. A possible 20 centimetres of whirling, swirling white stuff. Perfect! And boy, is it ever coming down.

Unfortunately, the blowing snow has not been kind to the already-beleaguered deer decoration on our front lawn.

You see, I became the proud owner of little Mr. Deer a few weeks ago when Lindsay was clearing out her garage and giving away all of the odds and ends Bill & Sue didn't want to take to their new house and that she herself had no use for. I immediately snagged the deer. Last year, having just moved in shortly before the holiday season, we had no time to get up Christmas lights. This year, we discovered there is no way of putting any up on the house, so Mom, Luke & I put some lights on a few of the trees in the yard. I was still disappointed that we didn't have enough.

That's why I snagged the deer. I thought he would make a lovely, twinkly addition to our outdoor decorating.

Upon taking him out of his box and plugging him in, we discovered that his front legs didn't light up, nor did his neck, but the rest of him was fine. He even had a head that swiveled slowly back and forth. I thought he was pretty cool!

So this past Saturday, I pegged him down into the frozen ground - so sure he wouldn't budge - and for a night or two, he was happily lit up and guarding our front door.

Then, the other evening, I noticed his head had gone out. No more lights from the neck up. I tried to fix him, but my attempts were in vain. I couldn't get the lights back on. I disregarded our neighbour Shannon's text ordering me to "Go outside and fix your damn deer, he's freaking me out". I didn't think he looked that bad. Then, yesterday morning, her status on Facebook read that she was travelling to work and laughing about my headless deer.

Then a couple of people "liked" her status. Ok, I thought, so maybe my deer needs some help.

I tried tweaking the bulbs and twisting the wires again last night, but I couldn't get the bugger to light up if I paid him.

Then, this morning, it was a complete horror show. During the night, the twirling, swirling blowing snow had knocked my half-lit deer down. When I went outside, he was face-planted into a little drift, and his swiveling head literally made him look like he was having a seizure. Right there, on our snowy front lawn. Not only that, his belly cage protecting all of his wires was open and filled with snow.

I'm sure Shannon was cracking up over it.

Our poor deer.


Sharon said...

This blog totally made me laugh. Wayne and I only have one out door decoration and it's a wreath hung on my door. That's the extent of it... I don't think I would ever put anything on the lawn because we get a lot of heavy winds. It just rolls off the mountain. But someday, we will get our act together and put christmas lights outside on the house. It will be quite the task when it comes up.

RIP Mr. Deer

Stacy said...

poor Mr. Deer...haha! Glad to see that you provided the community with some humour though!

Kara said...

I can just picture it - that is hilarious!! Should I get u a deer for Xmas?

Jill said...

No, I'm DONE with deer! LOL

Anonymous said...

I am actually laughing out loud Jill, love it!