Anxiety Level: High

I saw this tweet this morning on Twitter:  "Not the *best* week for people with anxiety."

Amen, brother.  A-fucking-men.

Dudes, I'm trying really hard here.  Trying REALLY hard to reassure myself, telling myself I'm OK, everyone I know is OK.  Nothing bad is going to happen to us.  Coronavirus is not going to wipe out the whole world.  I'm washing my hands like a mad woman, singing Happy Birthday twice each time I do it, taking every precaution I possibly can just in case.  My hands are quite literally about to fall off they are so dry and scaly from being washed so much.  But I'm willing to do it to keep the fears at bay.

But it's feeling a little scary right now.  I'm having a harder time each day to calm myself down.

Last night was especially bad.  I crawled into bed around 10 to 10 with my book, and before opening it, I thought, "Just quickly check Twitter, see what's going on with the world."  And holy mother of GOD, there was a LOT going on with the world.

Tom Hanks has coronavirus.
Rita Wilson has cornavirus.
An NBA player with the Utah Jazz has coronavirus.
The other day, he joked about it and touched all the microphones and recording devices at a press conference.
They also played the Raptors just a few days ago.
The NBA has shut down.
The NHL is probably going to shut down today.
Ellen is going to be doing her show without an audience.  (I assume other talk shows will follow suit as well.)
Trump put a travel ban in place to Europe.  (which I now understand isn't really a "ban", just restrictions, so maybe not as huge as origianlly thought.)
Pretty much any big event planned for the next several weeks is being cancelled.

It's all feeling very end-timey.  I keep think of the Stephen King book The Stand.  Stephen King himself has come out and said this is nothing like his book, but I can't help but feel there are some striking similarities.  It's alarming how quickly this thing is spreading.  And they are now taking measures that a few weeks ago seemed laughable.

I called my mom right away, and I was like, "Um... the world is going nuts.  Tom Hanks has coronavirus."  And she kind of laughed at me and told me to stop looking at my phone.  Which only makes me want to look at my phone even MORE.

For a worry-wart like me... it's not exactly the most fun I've ever had in my life.

The introvert/hermity side of me is OK with it.  I mean, it definitely seems like the day is (quickly) approaching when they will be telling us to stay home if at all possible, at least for a while.  As I said yesterday - being holed up at home watching Netflix and living in my bubble doesn't bother me one bit. 

But the rest of it?  eek.  I don't like it.  I'm nervous.  Yesterday they confirmed the first case in Ottawa, so it's getting closer to home.  It was easier to ignore when it was all "so far away". 

I am still trying to calm myself.  I read things that tell you to stay calm and be informed.  Take precautions.  Don't freak out.  Be vigilant.  Wash your hands.  I'm not really in the at-risk demographic, so even if I did get it, symptoms would likely be mild and I'd be OK. 

It's still very hard not to get wrapped up in the fear-mongering and panic.  Honestly, there are some friends on Facebook who are sharing some pretty scary posts.  I realize many of them are not true, or are hyped up to sound worse.  I understand that I should not let them bother me.  I am very close to "hiding" some of those friends from my timeline because they are, quite seriously, not good for me.

Not much on social media is good for me right now, though, honestly.  It's too easy to get caught up in and to let the panic take hold.  I need deep breaths and soothing teas and calming essential oils.  Not crazy Facebook posts warning me that in two weeks, our whole country could be on lockdown and our hospitals overcrowded and our doctors getting sick and not able to help the rest of us.

A global pandemic is definitely not my cup of tea.  I really hope that this thing is being blown out of proportion, and it fades like a bad memory very soon.  I was hoping for a stress-free spring with no flooding this year... and now this.  ugh.

I don't really have a way to end this, other than I hope you're all staying healthy and clean and not stressing out about it.  Trust me, I'm doing enough of it for all of us.